It’s that time again. Meaning, it’s been a couple years since I last repaired it, and once again our cats have littered our duvet with several tears from their cute little claws.
And because sometimes I go out of my way to make a simple solution more complex, rather than just sewing it with the machine like I did the last time, I thought it would be brilliant to make some gorgeous scrappy patches for it, à la Pinterest.
The method: Determine color scheme. Gather fabric scraps. Waste time perusing the internet for ideas, under the guise of research.
And finally, pick up a piece of grey cotton, and hold the scissors against it.
Angle the scissors this way and that. Try to imagine the finished shape I’m going for.
Hem and haw, uncertain.
Aaaaand I’m stalling, doing nothing…and I realize I’m actually afraid to cut into the fabric.
Why? It’s just a small piece of unused material. It’s not like I’m ruining anything if I make a mistake.
But no, making a cut means a tiny bit of commitment. It means I’m officially starting this project. And it means the possibility of error, of ending up with something I don’t like, of eventually tossing these efforts into the trash bin.
And that’s the real crux of my hesitation.
I’m afraid to make this cut because I don’t know what I’m doing. I’m afraid it will be ugly, that it will be a waste of fabric, time, attention.
Holy Spirit corrects me: It’s not a waste. It’s never a waste. It’s how the process works, and you are learning.
And hey, Love…you’re making it out of scraps, anyway.
He’s right, of course. This is a project pulled together from scraps of material, worked on in scraps of time.
And the first try is ugly. A mess. Wrong stitches, wrong placements.
But this is how we learn: By trying. By making the cut.
Part of the problem was that my cuts were too small, too safe, too conservative. I was trying to not use too much fabric or make the pieces too big.
Why do we do this? The Lord offers freedom and gives us so much creative material to use. But whether it’s perfectionism, procrastination, overthinking, or fear of what others will think, we often hesitate and hold back, entertaining all the wrong what ifs.
But why are we afraid to waste what is already dedicated to burn?
For through the law I died to the law, so that I might live to God. I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
– Galatians 2:19-20
If we have really laid ourselves down, determined to die to self and let Him be Lord and live through us, why do we keep trying to jump off the altar? Why do we keep trying to determine how hot the fire gets, and to control the burning?
Maybe we use the phrase “making the cut” in the wrong way. We think it means approval, that we’re allowed to stay in the game, that we’re good enough. And that’s the problem right there.
In Jesus, we already have approval. We’re already in the game. He has made us good enough, because it was never about us being able to meet a particular standard.
It’s always been about Jesus being the standard.
So really, making the cut is about our willingness to move forward in that freedom. We invest the talent, the time, the materials, the effort. We risk the unknown outcomes, and lay down our desire to be seen as flawless and infallible, rather than burying ourselves safely where we don’t even accrue interest.
Will we mess up? Yes!
Will Jesus be shocked, dismayed, and disappointed? No.
We make something beautiful by daring to try. We may not start perfectly – we might need to undo, redo, and repent. But we use it all, our whole life, and we don’t hold back to preserve what’s meant to revert to dust anyway.
And then we find that instead of a stifled lifestyle that ties us up in knots of stress and perfectionism and anxiety, focused on self-preservation and lack, we are walking in Kingdom culture. Our lives breathe the Kingdom in vulnerability and discernment as we are willing to risk honesty and transparency with others.
Can I ask…where have you been hesitating? To what material have you been holding the scissors to, afraid to make the cut? And what is the fear you’re fighting? If you can identify it, you can move forward faster.
I’d love to hear your thoughts if you need help untangling this; just reply to this email.
Personally, Vin and I have made several “cuts” in the last few weeks as the Lord has brought clarity and certainty to us about a shift we’ve been sensing. We’ve arranged meetings and asked for advice and counsel. We’ve said things out loud that surprised us. And it’s all been good – don’t panic, I’m not getting ready to drop a scandalous announcement – but it has also pressed us (at least, me) into a new level of bold surrender.
Are you ready for a soft announcement?
We’re moving toward full-time ministry, which means we are also moving into being fully donor-supported. Still writing, still sharing, but with less paywalls and prices. Less business, more availability for the needs God is putting right in front of us…whether they are local or in our inbox.
We are using it all, our whole life, to help people live out Kingdom culture, deep and wide.
He himself granted that some are apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until all of us come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ.
— Ephesians 4:11-13
As a result, we’re even more focused on wholeness and healing, and we’re asking for monthly partnerships to help us do the work of expanding Kingdom culture, so we can still do other exciting things like pay the mortgage and buy groceries.
Many of you already support us through monthly or yearly subscriptions, and we’re so grateful for you. If you’d like to increase that giving or become a monthly supporter, you can mail donations to our address below, or donate through Buy Me A Coffee or Zelle (our email there is contact@vinceguerra.com). We’re still fleshing this out and will have more info to share soon….thanks so much for helping us make this cut.
To anticipate one question: We are not (and won’t be) a non-profit, and we will continue saying whatever God leads us to, whether the government or other entities like it or not.
As for the duvet, I’m just handstitching it. Forget Pinterest. :)
Praying for you,
Shannon
P.O. Box 298086
Wasilla, AK 99629
P.S. This was a fabulous little message about overthinking.
P.P.S. Grit is going to be available in paperback next month! You can pre-order it here and they’ll ship on August 19th.
