all things for good

Last night, for the first time in two years, I stood during worship and enjoyed the full benefit of our childcare ministry. All the little kids were in their classes, and as we sang “I will fear no evil for my God is with me” my biggest distraction was trying to live that out in the moment, and not freak out about all of the potential fallout from this experiment.

all things for good: risking failure without fear

With only one exception, Andrey and Reagan have sat with us in church for two years. We attempted Sunday School classes for them when we first brought them home, quickly realized the error of our ways, and have kept them with us ever since. This, from an amazing pro-adoption church that has an incredible special needs ministry already in place. It wasn’t their fault; we just weren’t ready. But we’ve spent the last two years learning and communicating, and the last several weeks training and doing more communicating, and lo and behold: Reagan has joined class again at church. So far, so good – no fallout, no backlash. This is a huge victory.

So we went all crazy radical and let Andrey go to class, too – which leads me to the verse of the day, friends:

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. 

– Romans 8:28

How did it go? Let’s just say…it wasn’t a victory for him. But last night was a wonderful, safe opportunity for failure. And we learned, the staff learned, and grace abounds for each of us as we navigate the details of care and communication. Andrey learned, and consequences are swiftly applied. No class anytime in the near future, because class is for big kids who don’t use their bodily fluids to manipulate the attention and time of others.

And we’re calling it good. It works together for his good, for our good, for our church’s good, because God doesn’t waste a thing.

Not our past, not our mistakes, not our ignorance and not the sins of others – nothing is wasted. In the stewardship of heaven, it is used for good, and turned in our favor.

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We see it in Joshua. A grave mistake was made in the first battle after Jericho – one man sinned, the entire nation lost the battle of Ai, and it was a devastating follow-up to what had looked so promising after the victory at Jericho.

And yet…God. They dealt with the sin, and God sent them back to Ai. He turned the failure on its head and used it for good:

And I and all the people who are with me will approach the city. And when they come out against us just as before, we shall flee before them. And they will come out after us, until we have drawn them away from the city. For they will say, ‘They are fleeing from us, just as before.’ So we will flee before them. Then you shall rise up from the ambush and seize the city, for the Lord your God will give it into your hand.

– Joshua 8:5-7

They won the city. And the next one, and the next one, and then one king came to try to help another city against Joshua and the Israelites, but that was a bad idea because they beat him, too. On and on, until they cleared Canaan, north and south. They wiped the giants from the land.

In our lives, even small setbacks and seemingly simple errands – a missed appointment, wasting time stuck in traffic, or just dropping off a movie at the Redbox kiosk – these are details that are divinely appointed, orchestrating time and events like notes in a song that come to play in just the right moment.

His timing is perfect; He doesn’t sway His plans due to our opinion of dissonance.

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I want you to know, brothers, that what has happened to me has really served to advance the gospel, so that it has become known throughout the whole imperial guard and to all the rest that my imprisonment is for Christ.

What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed, and in that I rejoice.

Yes, and I will rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance.

Phil. 1:12-13, 18-19

We know that big leaps in progress with Andrey and Reagan are often met with significant regressions in other areas – for some reason they come hand in hand, like a baby crying during a growth spurt. But in order for them to grow and experience victory, we have to risk failure, even though we will all live with the consequences from it. And He will use it for good. Shout, for the Lord has given you the city…

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For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.

– Romans 8:29-30

God, tonight I’m praying for these Called Ones, that they would know the mighty vision you have for each of them and that they would step boldly out there into it, unflinching and unafraid of failure because victory is at hand.

We must risk failure without fear, knowing that dissonance is covered with the grace of a brilliant God who can handle both our mistakes and those of others. We were meant to clear the giants from the land. We were made to win the cities.

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This is day 20 of Without Ceasing: 31 Days of Relentless Prayer. Find the other posts here. To get new posts right in your inbox, subscribe here.

a union full of grace

It’s our 17th anniversary. We have the day off, but nothing planned – I think we’re hoping for an extra midweek Sabbath, of sorts. I love this man and our life together; our success has been hard-fought and full of grace, and little credit goes to either of us because we messed up right and left in our first several years of marriage, and spent the next several trying to detangle it all.

a union full of grace: truth about rejoicing and mourning

We are so grateful, and yet we know that there are others close to us that are hurting and raw in this area. How do you celebrate anything without rubbing salt in the wounds of others who are in pain?

For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.

– Romans 12:3-6a

We praise the achievements of advanced students while we recognize the struggle of those who fight hard just to remember the process of long division. We cheer for families who experience great triumph while we honor those who are still in the trial of their lives. We rejoice at healings, while holding the hands of those who are still in the hospital bed.

Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.

– Romans 12:10-12

As I finished writing last night’s post, we learned that cancer took a family member with the finality that left my beautiful cousin without her husband. We celebrate our anniversary this year with sobriety in the awareness that life is far too short sometimes.

Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.

– Romans 12:13-15

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Lord, I’m praying tonight for those who are hurting – that You would comfort them and protect them from the lies of the enemy; that those who are going through loss would know that You are not done with them yet, that their story is not finished, and that Your plans for them are wondrous and good in spite of anything the enemy has thrown at them. I’m praying for hope, for encouragement, for truth, for healing…for purity in marriages and health in families everywhere.

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Life is messy and full of hurt sometimes. We think beauty resides in the ideal – the poster-child family, the picturesque life – and it does, but that beauty is surface deep and often fleeting. We look, we admire, and we walk away. We move on, as through a shop full of beautiful curios.

We look twice, though, at the beauty forged in life’s gritty crucible, that grace that makes us stop in our tracks: the child who learns to read in spite of multiple diagnoses, the couple who makes it through infidelity and scandal to ministering to other marriages, the grieving spouse who climbs out of devastating loss to find joy again. We admire the tenacity and steadfastness of those who turned shame on its head and walked out warriors. We pause, we think, we stop and stare, as in a museum of heroes and heirlooms – none flawless, all scarred from age and wear, having earned their stripes in the trenches. Full of grace, they display the awful truth that rejoicing and mourning go together, creating the alloy called victory.

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This is day 14 of Without Ceasing: 31 Days of Relentless Prayer. Find the other posts here. To get new posts right in your inbox, subscribe here.

give me a sign

*This is an excerpt from Oh My Soul: Encountering God in Honest, Unconventional (and Sometimes Messy) Prayer, available for purchase at Amazon and anywhere books are sold.

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God…just tell me. Which way? This thing, or that thing?

give me a sign: how to tell if we're waiting...or just stalling

We ask for doors to open, doors to shut, and when we go to check, they’re swinging back and forth on their hinges. Not helpful. This isn’t what I asked for.

He says, What did you ask for, Love?

And I think, oh…nothing much. Just an answer. A clear answer. A neon sign. Something really bright with flashing arrows would be perfect.

I don’t usually use those. Especially when I already told you what to do.

And there’s the rub.

He said, “But I will be with you, and this shall be the sign for you, that I have sent you: when you have brought the people out of Egypt, you shall serve God on this mountain.”

– Exodus 3:12, ESV

And when the soles of the feet of the priests bearing the ark of the Lord, the Lord of all the earth, shall rest in the waters of the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan shall be cut off from flowing, and the waters coming down from above shall stand in one heap.”

– Joshua 3:13

Step in. You have to get your feet wet first. Walk where I tell you…and then watch Me hold the waters back.

Confirmation comes after obedience, not before: the waters won’t move while we stall at the shoreline. We think we want a sign for directions, but the sign He wants to give us is recognition for achievement. A crown.

We are so busy asking for excuses not to use our faith that we miss the opportunity to win the medal at the end of obedience.

You must rely on Me. Trust to the last uttermost limit. Trust and be not afraid. You must depend on Divine Power only. I have not forgotten you. Your help is coming. You shall know and realize My Power.

Endurance is faith tried almost to the breaking point. You must wait, and trust, and hope, and joy in Me. You must not depend on man but on Me, on Me, your Strength, your Help, your Supply.

God Calling, edited by A.J. Russell

Sometimes when we say we are waiting on Him, the truth is…we’re just not trusting Him. We settle for so little in the stalling to obey.

How do we tell the difference? Are we stalling, or are we waiting?

Did you do what I already told you, Love?

Well, yes. I mean, sort of. Mostly, I think.

And I realize I sound a lot like my son when I ask him if he made his bed in the morning. And almost always, the truth is…no.

No, not really. I didn’t really do it all the way, just sorta spread the top blanket around to cover up the wrinkly sheets underneath. I thought that would be good enough.

And God tells me the same thing I tell my son: Go back and check again. Dig a little deeper, more than just making things look good on the surface. Do it right once, and you won’t have to do it over and over. You won’t have to keep asking me if it’s done, because you’ll know it is.

When we are stalling, looking for a sign, what we are really asking is, Is it good enough?

But when we are waiting on Him after the leap has really happened, we’re all-in, without a back-up plan. We won’t be looking for the rip cord in the parachute, because we didn’t bring one.