bricks without straw: the struggle that leads to freedom

You wouldn’t think gardening could make you that sore. You pull out seed packets, you put seeds in the dirt, you water.

But no, it’s not that simple because you actually have to move a lot of that dirt and water. Pots go here, pots go there. All the pots need filled with dirt and then you realize, Wait, that spot looks funny. So you go back to rearranging.

A bench is in the way, in the prime real estate of the porch’s sunny south side. You try moving it but no, BIG nope, that’s going to hurt tomorrow. So your husband comes and together you pivot (“PIVOT!” yes, I was thinking that, too) to the other side of the deck. Ahhh, done.

But no, not so fast, because there’s that empty space where the bench was, and you still need to put pots there. Drat.

And that’s how it goes.

bricks without straw: the struggle that leads to freedom

That night in the shower as I scrubbed the dirt off my feet I found a particularly dark spot under all of it, and rubbed at it. Ew, a blister? No, different texture, not rubbing off. Kind of gummy. Ah, tree sap. Gross.

This is how we cultivate life: Hands in the dirt, doing the work, asking for help, making a lot of turns and finding new perspectives, feeling the burn and ache of too much movement when we try too much on our own, and in the end, we still have to trust God for the harvest because we don’t control the weather or what goes on underground. And even if we fence what we can, there are still other critters out there who want to steal the harvest.

(Peter Rabbit, I’m looking at you.)

It’s raining so we are doing inside-the-house things, and I tried something new today: recording audio downstairs. It’s still empty where Iree moved out; we haven’t rearranged rooms yet, and I thought it would be quieter in the basement. Less traffic, less airplane noise.

WHAT WAS I THINKING.

Quail roosters crowing in the bathroom overhead. The furnace and water softener kicking on. And then, so help me, someone flushed the toilet.

(“…John seventeen says, All mine are yours, and–” BA-WOOSH, gurglegurgle pflalbghghghrrr…)

The new quail are almost fully grown, so they will quiet down soon. Our oldest son came over the other day and asked why the males crow so much, and I told him it’s because they feel safe – they can make noise because they know they’re not in danger. When they go outside, they don’t crow as much.

And, well…when they’re in the freezer, they’re absolutely silent.

We make more noise and move more freely when we feel safe, too. We try new things, have room for mistakes, we try again, and get better. We tend to ask for help from people we trust and we get comfortable with the tasks we do over and over again.

And then something changes suddenly: A financial challenge, or a health issue, or a move, or a basic routine gets rearranged, and we’re like…Ugh, now I have to figure this out all over again.

I like (no, love – like, looooove) routines and predictability. I prefer flexible structure with just enough variety to keep life interesting. I like reading new books but I want to choose which ones they are. I want to learn new things, but do it on my own timeline and with my own curriculum.

And to some extent the Lord allows it, but the last few several dozen years have brought plenty of surprises to keep us on our toes and on our knees, trusting Him for what we needed as life shifted under and around us. We haven’t wanted to learn certain things that He’s put in our way. I was happy with the worn trails I was used to, where I knew all the turns and risings and places where you had to step over tree roots that crept onto the path.

But He is constantly forcing us to branch out into new territory. There have been so many times I felt suddenly lost in unfamiliar ground, unsure of how to go on, or how to do what He was calling us to. I have often felt like we were making bricks without straw, and we are there again in this season.

So I’m reading Exodus 5, where the Israelites really had to make bricks without straw.

Or, not without straw, but it was no longer just given to them. They had to go find it themselves. It was punishment from Pharoah – and not just punishment, but it came as a result of Moses obeying God and telling Pharoah to let the Israelites go.

Let’s go back a little bit, because this is often our life, too:

Then Moses and Aaron went and gathered together all the elders of the people of Israel. Aaron spoke all the words that the Lord had spoken to Moses and did the signs in the sight of the people. And the people believed; and when they heard that the Lord had visited the people of Israel and that he had seen their affliction, they bowed their heads and worshiped.

– Exodus 4:29-31

Then Moses and Aaron went to Pharoah, gave him the message, and he said, No, BIG nope, you’ve clearly got too much time on your hands. Let’s make things more difficult for you.

So, to sum up:

We hear God, we do what He says, we feel hopeful about the future, and wham, the hammer drops. THANKS A LOT.

Is this life, though? We try new things in obedience and they don’t seem to work out. Or they get harder, or the circumstances become worse, or the whole situation reveals itself to be more complicated than you realized in the beginning, and if you knew how complicated it was going to be you wouldn’t have taken it on in the first place and that’s probably why God didn’t tell you…because he was protecting you from disobedience.

But maybe things are working out…they’re just still working out.

Because here’s the part of this story that struck me:

[Pharoah said] “Go and get your straw yourselves wherever you can find it, but your work will not be reduced in the least.” So the people were scattered throughout all the land of Egypt to gather stubble for straw.

– Exodus 5:11-12

They still had what they needed; it just wasn’t handed to them anymore. Suddenly they had the freedom to find it for themselves. The middle man was eliminated. They could get the straw on their own without the process being controlled by someone else. And that’s significant, because straw comes from grain, which is food for them and their livestock.

Yes, it was more work. Yes, it seemed impossible. No, they would never have done it if they hadn’t been forced to. But do you see what happened here?

The Lord is preparing them to be delivered. They are forced to be resourceful. They have to get to know the land around them.

Because the Exodus is coming.

How many things have you done in the last year or so that you never would’ve taken on if you didn’t feel compelled to? I can think of a zillion things – well, at least seven – that I could’ve easily left on my “someday” list. (Or, honestly? My “never in million years” list.)

For example, I love the chickens, but I probably wouldn’t have chosen to have two coops full of them. And the quail? No way. Also, I never would’ve pursued several business skills we’ve had to figure out and push through. And there are so many things I’ve learned about our government and systemic corruption and history that I was happier not knowing.

But the Lord has continued to say, Dig deeper. Look further. Try this. Get ready for that. Read about this. You need to know the land. This is a time to run faster than you think you can – and trust Me, you’ll be glad you did.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.

– 1 John 4:18

When obedience leads to more work, it feels like punishment because we aren’t seeing the promise on the other side of it yet. But the ache and the curveball and the new endeavors aren’t punishment; they’re growing strength. It’s upgrade.

It’s actually preparation for promotion, because God is getting us ready for freedom.



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storm in a teacup: a call for humble unity in the Church

We’ve discovered a new love around here: Kid’s coffee. It’s not really coffee – it’s dark herbal tea with a splash of milk – but it looks like coffee and our little guys love it.

Another thing they love is straws. Paper straws, plastic straws, striped straws, spotted straws. But it doesn’t matter how many kinds you offer, you can’t always please a four-year-old.

“No, not that one,” Kav said. “I want my whiskey straw.”

“Your what?!” He doesn’t even know what whiskey is. And no, he can’t read the Irish cookbook yet and I guarantee you he’s never heard of Irish coffee.

“That one!” he pointed. “My whiskey straw!” And there, across the counter, was his green plastic straw, the one that curls around and around…like a whisk.

Ohhhh. It’s not a whiskey straw, it’s a whisk-y straw. Got it.

storm in a teacup: a call for humble unity in the Church

Let’s just hope he doesn’t mention it in his Sunday school class, right? I can just see him walking down the hallway on the way to class with his brother, talking about their red and green whisk-y straws that they got in their goody bags from church last Christmas. Snort. All we need is a visitor overhearing that conversation, and all heck would break loose.

(“Martha! Did you heeear what they gave the children at the church down the road? Ohhh, my goodness gracious…”)

There’s a lot of talk lately about persecution in the Church ramping up, even in America. And it’s true. But ironically, the Church’s biggest threat in the West isn’t from unbelievers right now. That’s on the radar for sure, but it’s still mostly down the road a little ways because that threat is preceded and prepared for by the real one – which is believers who are too quick to run with not enough information, making snap judgments and getting caught up in offense and creating division in their wake.

If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.

– Mark 3:24-25

What’s interesting to me about that verse is that it takes place smack in the middle of two events: The first is when Jesus was accused of using demonic power to cast out demons. The second is when He warns against blasphemy of the Holy Spirit, because the scribes did not understand what He was doing and instead of trying to find out, they had accused Him of having an unclean spirit.

This is important to pay attention to because the biggest threat to the Church is its self-inflicted wounds, primarily of legalistic groups coming against Spirit-filled Christians, organizations, leaders, and ministries. The Church needs unity but it has never found it in finger pointing and accusation, spewing hate and vitriol against anyone who challenges their self righteous comfort zone. We must walk in humility and grace toward others, knowing that we don’t know everything.

Do we want to be right, or do we want to be righteous?

Unfamiliarity breeds fear, and fear breeds dissension. Or, as a wise friend of mine put it this week:

Fear, not put into check, creates a very destructive tribalism. There are good parts of tribalism, like team work and sharing like-minded goals, upholding biblical values, etc. When done with maturity, accountability, and balance, there is good fruit. When done out of balance — check lists and qualifiers that produce a “mean girls” atmosphere, like “you can’t sit with us!” — then tribalism can turn into cannibalism. It seems to me the Church is being cannibalized from within and while that has somewhat been an issue for awhile, it has been going atomic since 2020.

Do charismatic, Spirit-filled churches do weird things? Yes. Yes, we are weird…and so were those guys in the Bible. Especially Jesus. (Do you take Communion? That’s weird. Doesn’t mean it’s wrong, though.)

I am not wildly demonstrative in church – I blame this on my inability to clap in rhythm – but I remember years ago taking a younger friend to a Sunday service and she was aghast that weird people raised their hands during the singing. And this was a conservative, non-denominational church. No speaking in tongues, no healings, no deliverances, no signs and wonders, no loud prayer, no prophetic words…just slightly cringey worship music from the 90s.

It should be noted that all of those things – with the possible exception of slightly cringey music – are totally Biblical. Just because something is unfamiliar to us doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Likewise, just because the enemy has warped or counterfeited something doesn’t mean the real deal is wrong, either.

We have salt lamps in our house and some people think those are New Agey. So, okay, New Agers use salt lamps for whatever reason, but we use them because they really do clean the air (they attract water molecules and the warm salt traps particles of dust, pollen, smoke, etc) and they reduce EMF by neutralizing positive ions in the air. Salt lamps don’t have those virtues because of an evil power, but because God made those combined elements of salt and heat to do that. If we didn’t know about the science and we used salt lamps for some kind of spiritual power outside of Jesus, that’s one thing. But what about lighting a candle in the window and using it as a reminder to pray? Could that be New Agey? Um, maybe, I guess…but it doesn’t have to be.

When I post prophetic words, people could ignorantly interpret that as a Christian version of a tarot card or horoscope. Some people don’t like it; lots of people completely reject the prophetic realm. But we’re going to see the Church awake to signs and wonders like never before — the Bible warned us repeatedly of it — and the big challenge will be, will the Church have faith for it, or will they walk in fear, afraid to leave the familiar? Will they worship the systems they know instead of the One they claim to know? This has always been the question; it’s why the rich man went away from Jesus grieved. It makes me think of Luke 18:8: When the Lord returns, will He find faith in the earth?

The enemy has counterfeited so many truths that some Christians are afraid of anything that remotely smacks of the mystical or unfamiliar, but there is a lot of mystical and unfamiliar in the Bible. Just because something has been abused or counterfeited doesn’t mean the real thing has lost its validity.

But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people, but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. I fed you with milk, not solid food, for you were not ready for it. And even now you are not yet ready, for you are still of the flesh. For while there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not of the flesh and behaving only in a human way?

– 1 Corinthians 2:1-3

God made science, and all truth is God’s truth. Science is catching up to a lot of truths and proving them all the time. But also, we need to stop fearing and condemning things we don’t understand. Not everything can be explained by science, and people of faith shouldn’t need it to be. And we definitely shouldn’t be too trigger-happy in condemning practices we don’t personally participate in when they’re not blatantly unbiblical.

This is how one should regard us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found faithful.

But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by any human court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. For I am not aware of anything against myself, but I am not thereby acquitted. It is the Lord who judges me. Therefore do not pronounce judgment before the time, before the Lord comes, who will bring to light the things now hidden in darkness and will disclose the purposes of the heart. Then each one will receive his commendation from God.

– 1 Corinthians 4:1-5

Here’s the nicest way I can say this: When we walk in ignorance, pride, and fear, we freak out over the dumbest stuff. And that plays right into the enemy’s hands. Church, we need to calm down and stop doing that.

I was asked this week on social media to share my position on a particular tempest in a teapot I’d never heard of, but the gist, as I discovered, was a new witch hunt against Spirit-filled churches. And for the curious, here’s my position on these types of things: I do not get involved in non-essential controversies. I don’t argue with people about Harry Potter, or The Shack, or medical marijuana. They’re such civilian matters. Whenever we are nitpicking someone else’s faith and doctrine we are putting our eyes on the wrong person.

What can you ever really know of other people’s souls – of their temptations, their opportunities, their struggles? One soul in the whole creation you do know: and it is the only one whose fate is placed in your hands. If there is a God, you are, in a sense, alone with Him. You cannot put Him off with speculations about your next door neighbours or memories of what you have read in books.

– C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

What is the fruit of these ministries, on both sides? I have never yet met a person who has accused a Spirit-filled church or pastor of whatever they disagree about doctrinally who has actually listened to their sermons. I have only encountered people who have taken clips out of context and soundbites from anti-charismatic websites. What is the fruit, though? The fruit from most of these charismatic churches is pretty good: healings, wholeness, deliverance, people coming to know Jesus, people maturing in the Word, people obeying Him in radical ways, and beautiful communities. The fruit from these other groups is dissension, division, pride, self-righteousness, confusion, and accusation. So-called “ministries” have no ministry at all if they are doing the enemy’s work of accusing the brethren. You will know them by their fruits…and that makes this kind of situation pretty obvious.

In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, in all things charity. That’s my position.

I think more and more will continue to come out that separates legalistic, comfort zone Church-ianity from Biblical, Spirit-filled abiding and practice. Wisdom is reserved for those who will not be tripped up by the spirit of offense. Offense and discernment are not the same thing and you will know them by their fruit.

The Lord is about to do something huge all over the place that will make the revival in Asbury look like the calm before the storm. But the enemy is frantically trying to subvert, delay, sabotage, and discourage us into thinking it’s not possible for us in this time. How do we fight back? How do we prepare the way? With unity, humility, grace, and our eyes on Jesus, not each other.

We’re not just capable of this kind of unity, we’re made for it. Do you remember the days shortly after 9/11? Here’s how Eric Metaxas describes them:

When you passed someone on the strangely empty and quiet streets, as we did, pushing our daughter in her stroller, you wondered if you were together at the end of the world. You exchanged glances that seemed to say: Yes, we are in this together. We don’t know you, but because of this tragedy we feel close to you. We are living through this together, and who knows what lies ahead?

– Eric Metaxas, If You Can Keep It

Are we ready for something like that again? Not if our favorite sport in the Church is friendly fire. But we can be. We are stewards of the mysteries of grace. We serve the One who’s already won, and we are on the same side, in this together. We just need to act like it.

first things, part one: how we pray to heal the land

Kav is sitting at the counter, staring blankly at his toast.

“The air makes my eyes blink,” he said.

I know, kid. Mornings are hard. The air makes my eyes blink, too.

The sun is rising earlier in the mornings now and setting later in the afternoons, and there’s a reckless feeling of freedom and hope that goes along with it after the shortest, darkest days of winter. We still have two months of snow left but we’re on the downhill slope of it and picking up steam.

first things, part one: how we pray to heal the land -- Shannon Guerra

You know what else is picking up steam? Crazy events around the world. I mean, we thought 2020 was nuts, but every year since seems to have taken it as a challenge to outdo the buffoonery of the one before. Talk about things that are hard and make your eyes blink: What can you do about a government that detonates chemical weapons in the heart of its own farmland?

It’s expected to affect at least 10% of America’s water supply. Fish, livestock, and pets are dying, people are getting sick, and many are afraid they’ve lost their homes forever. The mainstream media isn’t talking about it and has been trying to distract us with aliens instead because they think Americans are stupid (and for once they’re not completely wrong). It’s Look Here, Not There, because otherwise people will notice real things that are happening, like names being released of those who visited Epstein’s pedophile island, the beginning of World War 3, and, oh yeah, how the government has drastically escalated the sabotage of the US food supply.

But you won’t know about most of that if you’re getting your news from “the news,” which is exactly what they’re hoping for. Because, look! Aliens!

Since we do know, though, what can we do? How do we heal the land even while entities are actively trying to destroy it?

We can look at our own soil, and go back to the first things: We can pray. We can get in the Word. And we can get the Word out.

As for that in the good soil, they are those who, hearing the word, hold it fast in an honest and good heart, and bear fruit with patience.

– Luke 8:15

It’s not common anymore, but every once in a while you hear about land that is so fertile you just have to throw seeds at the dirt and abundant, massive crops spring out of it. Giant tomatoes. Huge pumpkins. I’m not talking about the stuff made from junky, synthetic fertilizers; I’m talking about the good soil that has been nurtured and fed through cycles of work and rest. You can practically throw pennies into the dirt and dollars burst out of it.

It’s similar to how there have been seasons that were uniquely favorable for particular vocations or endeavors. You know, those times in history when something was almost a no-fail prospect because business was so good or demand was so high, the connections came together flawlessly and opportunities aligned. Those who raked in the windfall may have taken credit for the massive success, but they really only happened to be placed into it by the grace of God since, in the given circumstances, it would’ve taken a very special kind of idiot to fail.

And this is the time we are living in, for intercessors. And that means you who already know you are intercessors, and also those of you who are tempted to tune me out right now because you don’t think I’m talking about you. But I am.

Other evils there are that may come; for Sauron is himself but a servant or emissary. Yet it is not our part to master all the tides of the world, but to do what is in us for the succour of those years wherein we are set, uprooting the evil in the fields that we know, so that those who live after may have clean earth to till.

– J.R.R. Tolkien, The Return of the King

You know what makes fertile soil? Lots of manure, but it has to be stewarded well. And that’s a good picture of our calling in these days.

Our hearts are to be the fertile soil, where situations drop in and we bear fruit no matter what. And that can feel heavy, like striving, unless we remember that we only bear fruit through abiding – and then we realize it is less about doing and more about being.

We are to be in proximity to the Lord, and not as a passive Yes-of-course-God-is-always-with-me knowledge, but as an intimacy that feels the impact of Someone’s presence. You know how when someone walks in the room and you immediately look over because you felt a shift in the atmosphere? You know how when someone across the room looks at you, and you sense it, and you look back? That’s the kind of proximity we’re talking about. We are abiding with the One who changes the atmosphere. His eye is on us, and we are looking back.

Now that we’ve established that, we can move on to the big question we couldn’t answer before. So, here it is:

How can we pray when events feel too big, too hopeless? How can we heal the land?

One obvious answer is in this verse:

…if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

— 2 Chronicles 7:14

And that’s a great start. But if we’re honest, it’s maybe a little too familiar to some of us and way too unfamiliar for the rest.

So what else should we know? How can we pray? How did Jesus equip us for such a time as this?

I read the story of Jesus and the Centurion to my kids this week. You probably know it; the Centurion’s servant is sick and he asks Jesus to heal him, so Jesus offers to come to his house. But the Centurion says that’s not necessary because he understands how authority works: You tell someone to do something, and they do it. There’s no question, no wondering if they’re going to obey, it’s as simple as one number following the next. The man was a leader over a hundred soldiers (that’s what a Centurion is) and he knew what he was talking about.

Keep that in mind as we look at one of the wild things Jesus said:

“Truly, truly, I say to you, whoever believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I am going to the Father. Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it.

– John 14:12-14

Why did He say we would do greater things than He did? I’m not totally sure, but I think at least partly it was because He knew we would be living in days that required greater things. In Biblical times they had corrupt leaders, too, but they didn’t have governments detonating chemical weapons on their own land and poisoning entire water systems. They didn’t have our dependence on electricity and other utilities. They didn’t have the threat of nuclear war.

So let’s look at a few things Jesus did that we may be able to apply to greater things in prayer:

  • He did many things multiple times: raised the dead, fed the multitudes, cast out demons, healed the sick, made the blind see, made the deaf hear, made the lame walk.
  • He calmed the seas. And this is interesting because in Matthew this story is shared just ten verses after the story of the Centurion that we just talked about, and He asks, “Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?” Sorta like He was asking, Weren’t you paying attention? You need to start applying this.

And we do, too.

We can pray and direct wind currents, and command contaminants to be gone. We can take authority over the principalities and powers that have corrupted our churches and institutions. We can pray purity into contaminated water. We can pray for eyes to be opened and evil to be exposed. We can pray for the deaf to hear and people to come to know Jesus like never before. We can take authority over our food supply and cancel the works of the enemy who continues to sabotage it.

That same enemy will hiss at you about how foolish this is. His snarling accusations are a cover for the terror he lives in because he knows what happens when God’s people pray with authority. He knows what happens when people know the Word and say “It is written.” He knows what happens when people stop worshiping their own comfort and what other people think about them, and start doing the things God tells them to. He knows he loses ground fast. The fields are white for harvest.

For the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men.

For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth. But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.

– 1 Corinthians 1:25-29

Not only did Jesus say we will do greater things than He did, but He emphasized twice right after that that when we ask in His name, He will do it. This isn’t about us being in authority over Jesus; this is about us being a conduit for His authority. He is eager to grant prayer that is aligned with His will. So it only becomes a question of knowing His will, and that goes right back to abiding and being in His word.

So now let’s look again at that scripture about healing the land, because things are starting to come together:

…if my people who are called by my name humble themselves, and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

— 2 Chronicles 7:14

Alright, we’ll take it one piece at a time: We are called by His name. We are humbling ourselves, unafraid to look foolish to the world. We are learning to pray and seek His face; we are in the Word and living in what it says. And we are turning from our wicked ways…wait, wait, wait.

We’re not that wicked, are we? Let’s put aside the obvious sins for a minute and consider: Have we worshiped our own ease? Have we abdicated responsibility and authority to others (like the government, or even church leaders) that we should’ve been doing ourselves? Have we slacked off in intercession? Have we thought “pray without ceasing” was a well-intentioned but unreasonable suggestion, instead of a clear command?

Ohhh. So maybe we do have some wicked ways to turn from. Maybe there’s more room to move.

The best time to do it was years ago, but the next best time is now.

The good news is it’s a fast repentance; no hoops to jump through, no paperwork to fill out, no waiting in line. Jesus, we’re sorry for worshiping what was comfortable. We’re sorry for waiting to intercede until the pain hit too close to home. We’re sorry for neglecting the harvest.

We’re ready to go back to the first things, so we can do greater things.

There is a move afoot, a reckless feeling of freedom and hope that is picking up steam. The One who shifts the atmosphere and has our eye is eager to teach us how to be better conduits of His authority, shaming the wise, and uprooting the evil in the fields that we know.


Part 2 is coming next week, and it’s about reading the Bible and filling the pantry of our soul. Subscribe here to get it right to your inbox.